Climbing The Confidence Ladder: How Our Thoughts, Feelings, and Beliefs Affect Our Confidence
Confidence is often perceived as an inherent trait, something one either possesses or lacks. However, confidence is more accurately viewed as a state of being influenced by our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Understanding this is key for personal growth and development. By using Bruce D Schneider's seven levels of energy as a framework, you can start to create awareness of where you are in relation to where you want to be. These levels range from catabolic (destructive) to anabolic (constructive) energy, with anabolic energy being the cornerstone of high performance.
Let's explore how each of the seven levels of energy can be applied to building unshakeable internal confidence.
Level 1: Victim Energy
At Level 1, individuals experience feelings of apathy, helplessness, and victimhood. They believe they have little to no control over their circumstances, which significantly undermines confidence.
Impact on Confidence:
Self-talk: Filled with statements like, "I can't do this," or "I'm not good enough."
Behavior: Avoids challenges and opportunities due to fear of failure.
Building Confidence at Level 1:
Awareness: Recognize and acknowledge feelings of helplessness.
Small Steps: Focus on small, manageable tasks to regain a sense of control and achievement.
Support System: Seek support from trusted friends, family, or a mentor to help shift perspective.
Level 2: Conflict Energy
Level 2 is characterized by anger, frustration, and conflict. Individuals at this level may blame others or circumstances for their lack of confidence.
Impact on Confidence:
Self-talk: Includes thoughts like, "It's their fault I'm not succeeding," or "I need to prove myself."
Behavior: Confidence is tied to external validation and competition.
Building Confidence at Level 2:
Channel Anger Constructively: Use frustration as motivation to take positive action.
Shift Blame: Focus on personal responsibility and what can be controlled.
Conflict Resolution: Learn and practice effective communication and conflict resolution skills.
Level 3: Responsibility Energy
At Level 3, individuals start taking responsibility for their actions and outcomes. They are more forgiving of themselves and others, which helps reduce stress and build a more stable foundation for confidence.
Impact on Confidence:
Self-talk: Includes, "I can handle this," and "I am doing my best."
Behavior: Individuals begin to set realistic goals and recognize their achievements.
Building Confidence at Level 3:
Self-Acceptance: Practice self-compassion and acknowledge progress.
Goal Setting: Set and achieve small, realistic goals to build a sense of accomplishment.
Self-Reflection: Reflect on past successes and use them as a foundation for future challenges.
Level 4: Concern Energy
Level 4 is marked by compassion and concern for others. Individuals at this level derive confidence from helping and supporting others.
Impact on Confidence:
Self-talk: Includes, "How can I make a difference?" and "I am valuable to others."
Behavior: Confidence grows through acts of service and the positive feedback received.
Building Confidence at Level 4:
Altruism: Engage in volunteer work or mentorship to boost self-worth.
Positive Relationships: Build supportive and encouraging relationships.
Empathy: Develop empathy for oneself and others, fostering a more positive self-image.
Level 5: Reconciliation Energy
At Level 5, individuals see opportunities in every situation and are open to collaboration. They are confident in their ability to find solutions and work well with others.
Impact on Confidence:
Self-talk: Includes, "Every challenge is an opportunity," and "I can learn from this."
Behavior: Confidence is derived from a proactive and positive outlook on life.
Building Confidence at Level 5:
Mastery Mindset: Look for lessons and growth opportunities in challenges.
Collaboration: Seek collaborative efforts and learn from others.
Innovation: Embrace creativity and innovative thinking to solve problems.
Level 6: Synthesis Energy
Level 6 is characterized by a sense of connectedness and intuition. Individuals at this level have high confidence that stems from a deep understanding of their purpose and potential.
Impact on Confidence:
Self-talk: Includes, "I am connected to a larger purpose," and "My intuition guides me."
Behavior: Confidence comes from a sense of inner peace and alignment with personal values.
Building Confidence at Level 6:
Mindfulness Practices: Engage in meditation or mindfulness to connect with your inner self.
Purpose Discovery: Reflect on and pursue activities that align with your core values and purpose.
Intuition: Trust and follow your intuition in decision-making.
Level 7: Absolute Passion Energy
At Level 7, individuals experience complete passion and a sense of oneness with all. They possess unshakable confidence that transcends external circumstances.
Impact on Confidence:
Self-talk: Includes, "I am limitless," and "I am one with everything."
Behavior: Confidence is inherent and unwavering, rooted in a profound sense of being.
Building Confidence at Level 7:
Transcendental Practices: Engage in practices that connect you with a higher state of consciousness, such as advanced meditation or spiritual practices.
Flow State: Pursue activities that lead to a flow state, where you are fully immersed and performing at your best.
Universal Connection: Foster a deep sense of connection with the universe and trust in your place within it.
The Interplay of Thoughts, Feelings, and Beliefs
Our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs are interwoven elements that collectively shape our perception of self-worth and capability, which in turn impacts our confidence levels.
Thoughts
Thoughts are the mental processes we engage in constantly. They can be rational, irrational, empowering, or disempowering. For instance, thoughts like "I can handle this challenge" foster confidence, whereas "I always fail" undermine it. Our thought patterns are often influenced by past experiences and can become habitual, leading to a fixed mindset where we believe our abilities are static.
Feelings
Feelings are emotional responses that arise from our thoughts and experiences. Positive feelings such as joy, pride, and excitement can boost confidence, while negative emotions like fear, anxiety, and doubt can erode it. For example, if someone feels anxious about public speaking, this emotion can overshadow their actual ability to perform well, leading to diminished confidence.
Beliefs
Beliefs are deeply held convictions about ourselves and the world. They often operate at a subconscious level and can significantly influence our thoughts and feelings. Beliefs such as "I am capable" or "I am worthy" underpin high confidence, while beliefs like "I am not good enough" create self-doubt. These core beliefs are often formed in childhood and reinforced over time.
The Role of Core Energy Coaching
Core Energy Coaching focuses on identifying and transforming the underlying energy that influences our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. This approach helps individuals shift from catabolic (negative) energy to anabolic (positive) energy, fostering greater confidence and overall well-being.
Identifying Limiting Beliefs
A core energy coach works with clients to uncover limiting beliefs that hinder their confidence. For example, a client may believe they are not good enough to succeed in their career. Through working with a coach, they help the client recognize the origins of this belief and how it affects their behavior and self-perception. By bringing these beliefs to conscious awareness, the client can begin to challenge and reframe them.
Shifting Perspectives
Core energy coaches facilitate perspective shifts, helping clients see situations from different angles. This can be particularly effective in overcoming fear and self-doubt. For instance, a client struggling with the belief that asking their boss a question will make them seem dumb can be guided to explore evidence of how true that is. Reframing it as a process of learning and growing makes them more valuable to their organization. This type of reframing ultimately helps build confidence.
Start Climbing the Confidence Ladder Now!
You can start building confidence right now, even before deciding to work with a coach. By focusing on your strengths and past accomplishments, you can shift your mindset from self-doubt to a mastery mindset. Reminding yourself of your capabilities and successes helps reinforce your self-worth.
How to Focus on Strengths and Accomplishments:
List Your Strengths: Write down your skills, talents, and qualities that you are proud of. This can include both professional and personal attributes.
Reflect on Past Successes: Make a list of your past accomplishments, big or small. Try to list 100 accomplishments over the course of your life where you felt proud, successful, or confident. Reflect on the effort and skills it took to achieve them. Use this as a resource whenever you are feeling insecure to remind yourself that you already have all the confidence you need inside of you.
Leverage Your Strengths: Use your strengths to tackle new challenges. Knowing you have succeeded before (see list of 100 accomplishments) can give you the confidence to face future tasks.
Conclusion
Confidence is not a static trait, but a state influenced by our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. By understanding and addressing these internal factors, we can cultivate a more resilient and positive sense of self. Core Energy Coaching offers a powerful framework for this transformation, guiding individuals to uncover and reframe limiting beliefs, shift perspectives, and increase overall energy levels. Through this process, you can build and sustain the confidence needed to navigate life's challenges and achieve your goals.
Schedule a discovery call here (It’s FREE) to explore how I can help you build confidence and perform at your peak.
This post contains my interpretation of the copyrighted work of Bruce D Schneider and the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC).